Question for girls (about approaching girls)?

So I%26#039;m kind of a shy guy and I%26#039;ve been reading some answers on here about how guys should approach girls and getting some good stuff. But one thing kind of strikes me as odd in some peoples responses. People say to just go up to a girl and say, %26quot;That%26#039;s a nice dress you%26#039;re wearing%26quot;, or %26quot;You look great in those shoes.%26quot; I thought about saying that to a girl I saw on the train today and I thought for a second and it just really seemed like I%26#039;d come off gay or something commenting to a girl like that. It%26#039;s not really a conversation starter, at least I don%26#039;t see it as one, and even if it did start a conversation, how do you talk about fashion or something like that... I don%26#039;t know, I guess my question is, ladies, if a guy came up to you and said you look great in that dress (whether it%26#039;s on the street randomly or a co-worker/classmate), how does that guy come off sounding? Would you see it as queer? If it doesn%26#039;t sound gay, where does the conversation go from there?

Question for girls (about approaching girls)?
I personally would feel a little weird about a guy coming up to me on the street randomly and saying that, not because I think it%26#039;s gay but because it doesn%26#039;t sound like a natural conversation starter with someone you don%26#039;t know, so I don%26#039;t think the conversation would go anywhere. If it were from a co-worker, I still wouldn%26#039;t think it was gay, just a nice compliment and a demonstration that guys do have good observation skills and would probably start explaining where I got it, why I bought it, which could easily turn into a decent conversation because everyone has to buy clothes at some point.
Reply:Use anything as a convo starter.





%26quot;How about them Spurs?%26quot;





%26quot;Do you know where Market Street is?%26quot;





%26quot;I can%26#039;t believe how beautiful it is out!%26quot;
Reply:No you wont sound queer but its still not something you want to say just simply say Hi how are you you live around here introcduce you self and if you like them ask them out its just like meeting an aquantince you can compliment just say like your very pretty or saomething like that
Reply:you soundlike my bf...lol


ok, just go up to someone and compliment them, or ask them about the game last night and if they saw it, or there opinion on the news headlines. Just dont let the conversation end unless the girl is really looking like she feels awkward.


As for the dress thing, im pretty nice (as are many girls) and i get how hard it is for guys to be expected to make the first move. So to that comment I would probebly laugh and say something back...but not think gay...


Give it a try!
Reply:I might be a bit scared that you are being too aggressive in talking to a complete stranger with a line like that - wondering if your motives are good or if you%26#039;re just out to hook up. If you%26#039;re looking to hook up - those girls could be impressed and you might get somewhere. If you%26#039;re looking for love - you%26#039;re barking up the wrong tree with this approach. Everyday - I read about women getting attacked by total strangers and I was once attacked by a total stranger who convinced me he was a nice guy - I mean think of this from a woman%26#039;s perspective. Nope - a good approach is to have something in common to start with such as taking a class, or joining a club. Then, you can say something intelligent - for instance if you%26#039;re in a bike club - you can say %26quot;hey - how often do you ride outside of the club?%26quot; and get a conversation going where there is some substence and sense behind what you%26#039;re saying so it doesn%26#039;t sound like you%26#039;re looking for your next hook up or might be a date rapist kind of guy.
Reply:well i was getting hit on i would like to hear hay how are you doing, ans i%26#039;ll belike fine how about you? like that just start some covershens.
Reply:it definately doesn%26#039;t sound queer! If you are being genuine, then it is a real compliment, and congratulations, you may have just made her day! A good follow up would be to introduce yourself and then let her take the lead from there. You could ask questions about hobbies, (complimenting a hobby or something unique works better than something about shoes or a dress, by the way) and then if it goes well, ask for her phone number. Wait a while, about a day to a week, call, and set up a date or just talk. Good Luck!
Reply:It doesn%26#039;t sound gay at all, but you have to make sure you don%26#039;t sound lewd or obnoxious, but sweet. Sound seem suggestive, just smile nicely. Or comment on something else, like a saying on her shirt or a pin.
Reply:i%26#039;d say thanx if i kno the guy, but if i didnt, then i%26#039;d walk away... it%26#039;s kinda creepy then... its not much of a convo starter. what do u say to a guy? say the to her... ok, not everything u%26#039;d say to a guy. well ask her about a teacher, a hw assignment... ask her %26quot;tutor%26quot; u. well, atart of by something u have in common or u say,%26quot;isnt that lunch crappy?%26quot; or something... yeah....
Reply:It sounds like you are uncomfortable with that starting line, why don%26#039;t you try saying hi or something like that. Then just start talking. Like if your both on the train or something say something about that, find something you have in common. You need to feel comfortable with what your talking about. That way you can be yourself.
Reply:It all really depends on how you say it. I tend to see better success with the guys that put a bit of emphasis on the word %26quot;you%26quot; and less on %26quot;that dress%26quot;
Reply:be yourself
Reply:Maybe you need to worry less about what people are going to think about you. That is a huge inhibitor.





If a guy came up to me, flapped his wrist and lisped, %26quot;Girlfriend, I just love your dress!%26quot; then yeah, I%26#039;d probably think he was a gay man.





Complimenting a woman is not %26quot;gay%26quot;; we%26#039;re not going to assume that because you like our dress or shoes that you want to wear them to your next visit to a gay bar. We will likely be delighted!





As far as where does the conversation go from there - that%26#039;s really going to depend on the situation. She will likely thank you for the compliment, and smile. Maybe ask if she%26#039;s from around there, ask if she can recommend a good place for coffee or something, or whatever. Then ask her to join you.





Good luck!
Reply:I am not sure how old you are or anything like that. I am 23, and if a guy came up to me and said that I would probably blow them off. I wouldn%26#039;t think you were gay or anything like that. I would just be kind of weirded out, I guess. I don%26#039;t know. Like someone had said before, say something like, %26quot;Are you from around here?%26quot; Or %26quot;Do you live around here?%26quot; Something like that. ALso, as another woman said, becareful on how you word something so you don%26#039;t come off as a pervert. B/c I would totally blow someone off if he seemed like a pervert. Also, just be yourself, b/c no one like to meet a fake. Remember woman can be just as shy as you and probably just as nervous as you are when you approach them if they are into you. I know if a cute guy hits on me, I get nervous! LOL ANyways~ good luck~! I think you will do just fine. ;o)
Reply:I would take it as a compliment. And if you followed it up with something like, %26quot;Oh God, did that sound gay?%26quot; I%26#039;d think you were not only nice but very funny. If I were available, I%26#039;d be interested in talking to you at that point to see where it might lead. By the way, women like shy men. And unless they are Paris Hilton types, women are not as concerned with classic good looks as men think we are. We are interested in men we have chemistry with. And that chemistry does not often coincide with what society perceives as good looks. I have rarely been attracted to a guy who%26#039;s hair is perfect - it seems a bit too feminine when the guy has a nicer hairdo than mine. But %26quot;women go crazy for a sharp dressed man.%26quot; (Old 60%26#039;s/70%26#039;s song)
Reply:well, im a girl, i hate my feet. i dont like guys looking at my shoes.


hahah


but be hot, and be yourselfff
Reply:There%26#039;s a difference between saying, %26#039;You look great in that dress%26quot; and saying %26quot;That%26#039;s a nice dress you%26#039;re wearing.%26quot;


Personally I would appreciate the second one because it%26#039;s a little less... well it%26#039;s less likely to be misconstrued as perverted.


If you%26#039;re a cute guy then even just saying Hi with a smile will do it for her. Just start with that, ask her how her day%26#039;s going.. it%26#039;s not too difficult.
Reply:Well,for one,It definitely depends on the tone you use. You know the difference in the tone of voice if your trying to impress someone or messing around with your friends,we all do.But if simply a guy walked up to me and said that,being the open book type of person I am I would take it as a complement.Don%26#039;t be afraid to approach girls,its not as scary as you think.I mean really whats the worst that could happen? When you try to talk to a girl,have a good self esteem!
Reply:I know you probably shouldn%26#039;t be getting advice from a girl who%26#039;s even too shy to go up and talk to a boy, but, since I%26#039;m a girl, I think you should just go up and talk to her. Strike up a conversation with her, ask what she likes, and stuff like that. Girls likes to talk, especially if something%26#039;s bugging us. We like to have someone to talk to about the problems. If you%26#039;re really shy, go up to her when she%26#039;s alone.
Reply:ok try this romeo...lol,Im jk k I like to pick,...but anyhow you ride the train right ok then thats where youll meet your ladies,find one that rides that train all the time bout the same times you do,when you find one see if she is normally alone or has company,(try to find one that is always alone),when you do jus go to her and say %26quot;I noticed you were sitting alone.....my name is------........would you like some company?%26quot;after that say somethin like%26quot;d you always ride this train?Or how come your boyfriend isnt riding with you? (i love that line)lol that is a good one because in a moment you will know *yes I am singel* or *I am not* lol.....I hope this kinda helps f ou want e-mail or IM
Reply:first, telling a woman that she looks good in that dress probably would make her feel good about herself, or help her self esteem or maybe not... but that%26#039;s on her not you. my opinion, i would be flattered and say %26quot;thanks%26quot;. I wouldn%26#039;t think that you were gay and where the conversation would go would really be up to either you or her. if there is chemistry or not?... but remember just be your self and everything will flow from there. trying to be or act like someone your not will just turn to chaos and then, you%26#039;ll feel and seem like a queer.
Reply:Be yourself is number one, but a great way to introduce yourself is just giving the girl a complement. YOu can do that two ways:


1.walk up, compliment, walk away...if you%26#039;re cute she%26#039;ll follow you I PROMISE.


2.walk up, compliment, introduce yourself, %26amp; ask her if she wants to grab coffee/lunch...not dinner yet, that too formal.


The conversation will turn to your lives the second way, the first way you get a shallow relationship...take yo pick!


Good luck, hope I helped.
Reply:It would sound weird yes. Usually you comment on someone%26#039;s looks after you know them to compliment them. When you don%26#039;t know them, it seems a little erie. How about, Hi my name is ? and see where it goes from there? Or, just say you noticed them and thought them attractive...in a not so stalker way lol
Reply:No, it doesn%26#039;t sound gay. Even if it did, that would make her wonder why you were talking to her. Mystery is good. If you%26#039;re going to sit in a corner and figure out why things MIGHT not work, you%26#039;ll never get in the game. You have some knowledge. Now apply it in real life. Confidence will come with experience. Experience comes with practice.
Reply:If u said it to me, which I don%26#039;t wear dresses anyway but, I would say thanx. and compliment u on something. usually shoes or shirt. I%26#039;m a tomboy so thats wat it would be for me.



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